13 September 2014

Blueberry Muffin Egg Sandwiches

So, the other morning, I woke up starving. Between the caloric output of feeding a 3.5 month old (the physical production and riddance of baby milk calories plus those calories burned while wrangling a fifteen-pound squirmy baby shake weight), and newly-added workouts, I am hungry ALL OF THE TIME! Like, waking up in the middle of the night and eating oatmeal kind-of hungry. And those of you who know me / my fellow sleep-deprived mamas know that if I am getting my butt outta bed and taking the time to walk downstairs and make myself food, I am really, really hungry. Because sleep takes precedence over all other things. Including showering. But apparently not eating. So, now that your appetite is surely whetted... 

Another irony of this post is that I am in a currently-failing 30 day challenge of eating clean, drinking water, and working out. The 30 day challenge is almost a total bust. Except that it is showing me what healthy habits work and what doesn't in this new baby-dictated world of mine. Like for instance, a total overhaul of healthy habits in 30 days doesn't work. 

However, I am slowly making healthier choices. 
Like instead of just eating six blueberry muffins with butter to curve my carb craving, I added eggs. See? Healthy(ier).
I'm sharing this with you because not only was this weird breastfeeding craving absolutely delicious, but it was also ridiculously easy. And delicious. And easy. I'm not really down with gross and difficult recipes, so, if you're not either, I'd say this was a delicious, easy win that I thought you might wanna try. 
I was taking a mental assessment of my pantry and fridge during an early morning feeding. Ok fine. I was awoken by my sweet baby whining in his crib. And as I lie there in my soft, warm bed hoping he might drift back to dreamland, my empty tummy started talking. And I listened. So, I got up and fed little man, during which I devised a delicious plan to feed myself.

Tummy: "You know there's a pack of blueberry muffins back there." 
Me: "Mmmmmm, oh yeah! Eggs and turkey bacon would be healthier though."
Tummy: "But blueberry muffins. Just add water."
Me: "What about an egg sandwich? We get carbs, and I get to tell Hubs I ate eggs. Crap! We don't have bread."
Tummy: "HELLO…blueberry muffins. Just put it in them."
Me: "Gross! Wait. …. sweet gracious, you're a genius."
They were every bit as delightful as they appear. I bought more blueberry muffins mixes at the commissary the next day. 
But the whole wheat kind. See? Healthy(ier).
I stopped stuffing my face long enough to send a picture text to Hubs just to show off what I was eating. Then I sent one to a friend too. I simply could not sit alone and devour such a treat and not tell someone. Or two someones. So, when Hubs got home for lunch (he gets to come home for breakfast AND lunch and it's the greatest), I had muffins and eggs left to share. (I know, right?! Quick, someone fist bump me for not eating every crumb.) Instead of bacon, he topped his off with last night's left over beef roast. (I never really had super strange preggo cravings. Conversely, Hubs concocted a cold chicken breast, slathered with peanut butter, and topped with a pickle one time. Seriously, he is the most handsome weirdo.) At least maybe a couple of you might be comforted that you have substitution options here.
Anyways, this was delicious. And easy. Here's how:

Serves: Two 
Disclaimer: the "two" is representative of Hubs and me and might not equal "two" of you and yours. It might serve three of you. Or two adults and two littles. If you have the self-control of a tabitian monk and would only partake of a single one of these babies, gather a flock of five other monk-like friends to meditate on these flavors with you. Or, if you can put away some food, like Hubs and I can, you will be finished eating this six sandwich fare, and long for more. But if we're being honest, I could eat all six in one sitting. Serves: One.

What You Need
1 12-hole muffin tin
1 package of blueberry muffins (makes 6)
5 eggs
6 slices of bacon, cut in half (I used turkey bacon)

What You Do
Grease all 12 muffin tins. Mix muffin mix as directed and scoop into six of the tins. In a bowl, beat five eggs and then use a measuring cup to scoop equal(ish) amount of egg into the remaining six tins. (I realized this was the best technique after the fact, so I don't know…maybe a 1/4 C cup would do the trick?) I baked as directed for the longest suggested time on the muffin mix package. So, 22(ish) minutes at 375 degrees for a dark, non-stick pan. 

Once that is in the oven, fry up your bacon. Just sizzle in a pan on medium to medium-high heat, flipping as needed. I pre-cut the slices in half so that they would be sandwich-size when done. And it's sooo much easier to flip while cooking. So, six slices yielded 2 half-slices per sandwich. But, as I always say, when in doubt…MORE BACON. Ok, I don't think I've ever actually said that. But I believe it. Unless it's flimsy. Then, why bother? It's like it's half-done. Restaurants that serve flimsy bacon make me nervous because it's just poor attention to a very important detail. Like, hey restaurant, what other important details are you satisfied leaving flimsy, huh? C'mon, crisp it up a little. digest digress.

When the timer went off for the muffins and eggs, I let them linger in there a little longer until the tops of the muffins really began turning a nice golden brown. Also, the eggs will bubble up. Like, each one will be one big bubble. When you take the tin out of the oven, let it cool for a few minutes. The bubbles will flatten. You can peel the top bubble layer right off, if you so desire. Or leave it on. It's tasty either way.

Half your muffin. Layer egg and bacon in between. You know, like a sandwich. Enjoy! 


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